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Wednesday, November 18, 2009


On nights like these it gets so hard.
I cry until my eyes ache and are swollen beyond belief. And to stop myself crying even more i run the hottest bath I can and lie in it. And there I lie, my scalding skin momentarily distracting me, and my breathing starts to slow to an almost normal pace.
But then my beath catches and it's all there again, too much to hold inside.
And I spy my innocent little Gilette Venus razor, lying on rim of the bath.




And it gets so hard, on nights like these, not to reach for it.

Monday, November 16, 2009

I must be stressed out about something, 
because I'm shopping online and I let Trace order pizza for dinner.






What, though?











Thursday, November 12, 2009

Never Go To War




     I had my first and last exam of the year today, French 1. I am almost certain I am going to fail. Somehow, I don't care all that much. Because I know I haven't worked hard this semester and really don't deserve to pass so I'm not going to dwell on it. But I have a feeling things are going to get better from here on out.
I just know it. 
Tomorrow my strictest (is that even a word?) diet and exercise regimen EVER begins. And I've got lots of shifts for work so money problems, fare thee well. Plus, working long shifts with little or no breaks means no time to pig out! And I KNOW I'll do better next year at Uni, because I'm going to work my butt off consistently and not let trivial things get in the way of the education my parents are forking out thousands of dollars for.




So yes, everything is going to be good.
I'm going to exercise lots and work lots and work on my art lots and be social lots.
Because I'm better now.

I'm better now.

Right?

Tuesday, November 10, 2009




Today we got a weighing scale that measures body weight, fat, bone mass and water weight.

Now my life can begin.




Thursday, November 5, 2009

Popped Almost Abstract Art

Work today was extremely tiring.
Not sure if it has anything to do with it, but I had a coffee and was shaking uncontrolably for most of my shift.
The photos are going to have to wait another day, because my memory card is acting up again. I really need a new digital camera, mine is literally too old
(in techno-trend years) to function.

Any suggestions?


Oh by the way, the photo is of my largest painting to date, it's acrylic on a 6 by 3 foot canvas. some of you may notice it bears a resemblance to the photo from this post. That picture (source unknown, apologies) was the original inspiration (I kept similar colour themes, as you can see) but I very much reinterpretated the mood and message of the piece to represent myself. Photo credit goes to Berlin. In the background is part of my 'exhibition' for Uni assessment. Comments or thoughts on my work are always welcome. I'm also thinking of selling some of my work. I dont really want to but I just don't have the space right now, and I could use the money.

Hmm this has been a slightly discombobulated post. 
I think I'll go do some jumping-jacks.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Ooh Ahh We've Got The Moves

I'm Back.

With a tan and tired eyes.





Update tomorrow. I've only got about a bajillion photos to upload.
I am extra fat and about to do something about it.
Hope you are all well.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Sorry

SORRY

sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry




I thought I would be lounging around with time to spare to prepare elaborate blog sposts but the second my assessment was over my job shifts multiplied and Nationals are in less than a week so every spare moment I have is filled with practice or jogging to try to lose some bloody weight before I leave for Sydney. But my camero memory card is blinking F U L L so I promise I'll find some time to post some photos before I leave.



Did I mention I'm sorry?